I'm a RockStar!!!

I've found it. I've finally found my talent. You know - the one I was born to do. The one that makes me skip my after-the-kids-get-on-the-bus nap in the morning. That talent that makes me feel like a rock star... I know you are all dying of anticipation but I'm going to make you wait for it. You have to meander through my hazy thought process to get to the really juicy stuff. Not to worry, it's worth it.

I'm really a jack of all trades. I'm good at a lot of things, but really could never say I was excellent at any one thing in particular. I guess if I had to choose, it is better to be pretty decent at lots of things than to suck at most things and excel in only one. I should be thankful - only for half my life all I could see was that I wasn't 'the best' at anything.

For example, in high school I was runner up for "Most Talented" in my senior year. We even had a run off vote to break the tie, not that I won... I should have been thrilled that I made it that far, but instead was mad that I didn't win. I applied for a nationwide scholarship with my employer, El Chico Mexican Restaurant, that same year. I should have been over the moon when I found out I came in second. Yeah, I know, it was a nationwide competition and I came in second. That's gotta count for something, right? Again, disappointed. I always got supporting or chorus roles in the musicals in high school, but never the lead. In college my voice instructor 'guided' me towards a new major. Again, disappointing. During my horse training/showing days, I came home with lots and lots of lovely 2nd and 3rd place ribbons. I should not fail to mention that I was 15 years old and competing against professional horse trainers who spent every waking ADULT minute living their profession. But again, I was disappointed.

Now I'm 34. I have graduated from college (where I really was happier as a business major than a music major). I've had the chance to work a few office jobs and then have felt pretty successful running my own business managing properties and rentals. And, I'm finally feeling pretty on top of this whole wife and mom thing (I know, just give me a minute to blink and my kids will be pre teens and I'll be moaning in agony). So, still I feel that I'm a jack of all trades until recently.

So here it is, here's the earth shattering announcement about Kitty Cannon and what's she's really good at and can't stop talking about. It's yoga! I absolutely love yoga! Last year my friend told me that she had started doing yoga and that she thought I would love it. Without saying it so bluntly, she basically said that I'm pretty high strung and that she thought yoga would help bring balance to my life. Again, put ever so gently and delicately as to not upset the in reality EXTREMELY high strung Kitty Cannon. So, I didn't really give it a second thought for about 6 months. Then my friend told me she got her certification to teach yoga and invited me to join her class. Wow! Can I say that from my very first class with Elizabeth (friend, not sister) I knew that she was absolutely, without a doubt, fantastically right about my needing yoga to balance my life.

I love it. I love the focus that it forces me to cultivate. I love the individual challenge that it brings to me personally. There is no competition when you walk into that studio. It's just me, my mat and my mind. It doesn't matter what the woman next to me is doing, but matters what I am doing. It doesn't matter if I can't achieve a particular pose that day, but more importantly what matters is where I am today compared with where I was yesterday, or a week ago or even a month ago. I love the feel of my legs as they shake to support my body as it is challenged to rise above what I thought I couldn't do. I love the feeling of achievement that comes when I learn a new pose or improve on one I have already learned. Somehow, in some crazy way that I don't understand, yoga clears my mind. It calms the 'voices in my head'. I can leave my day-to-day worries or aggravations (in China I have a lot of aggravations) at the door of the studio and walk in ready to be a total rock star.

I'm really good at yoga. My thick body, the one that I've always wanted to trade in for a slimmer and more 'petite' body - my muscular body, complete with a waist that will never, ever have that teeny tiny bikini look to it - that same body that I've never been able to love is awesome at yoga. How did it take me 34 years to find this out? Why did I never know that I am just inches away from a split, or that I can fold in ways that most people wouldn't even dream of? Why did it take me this long to find this one little thing that makes me feel amazing? I feel a tiny bit like Ammon from the Book of Mormon, who says:

"Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things...".

I'm not good at yoga because I am some superior being with super human powers. I'm good at yoga because God gave me a strong and healthy body. He gave me a body that He expects me to use for all kinds of service to others, but also to use for my own happiness and joy. Really, you'd never think that an exercise class would bring about a spiritual connection. But for me, yoga has answered a long sought after plight to love my body and to love myself. I may not be the best singer out there, I'm certainly not the most patient mom or the 'coolest mom ever'. I'm not the smartest or most successful business woman that ever walked the earth and I'm most definitely not an award winning blog author. BUT, when I walk in that yoga studio the entire world outside of yoga stops for an hour and a half and I am                                                            A ROCK STAR!!!!